YOU’RE SOOO REACTIVE — But Which Type?

“Self-esteem is the ability to see yourself as a flawed individual and still hold yourself in high regard.“ —Esther Perel You’re reactive. You really are. I know, ‘others’ are way more out-to-lunch when they’re upset and defensive, and they really need to get their act together (and wouldn’t they be significantly less annoying if they did?). But back to…

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I Posture, You Posture – We Need To Stop It!

In the tradition of authentic-relating, a distinction is made between two broad categories of inauthenticity: posturing and collapsing. Collapsing is to implode under the experience of pressure, it’s to succumb, give in, cave. It’s inauthentic because no one is actually inferior to others and so to act that way is disingenuous. Unsurprisingly, as a pervasive…

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Manage Your Intrusive Thoughts & Feelings

Although often ‘life’s a box of chocolates,’ sometimes it most assuredly ain’t. Metaphors of rollercoasters and rough-seas don’t come close to encompassing what some life-events do to us. Devastation comes in many forms, all bad, and while we undergo whatever trial Fate has in store for us and those we love, life, our life, must…

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Leveraging Defensiveness—Why You Should And How To Do It

Defensiveness is one of the monsters under our collective beds. Worse yet, under the guise of so-called Ego (being egoic, ego-driven, etc), Defensiveness practically becomes the secular version of evil; “defensive” is not something you want to be accused of, it’s a character flaw.  Well, if that is the case, then we are all similarly…

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